How can I pray for 'that'?

This weekend, Papa and I completed our training.  It is a very exciting step to have behind us.  This means we are further than we were last November.  We are prayerfully only weeks away from our first placement.
Most of the training was a review for Papa and I.  Because of the jobs we have, we are area of issues with children from behavior to the extreme.  We are even aware of the abuse that some children face.  However, now we are not talking about just statistics and 'any kid', we are talking about OUR kid.  Our future baby that someone is mistreating, maybe as I type.
We saw a video at training that follows a foster child from removal, to placement in foster care.  It is a very eye opening video.  If you have not seen it, I encourage you to watch it now. (ReMoved video)  I was also scrolling through Facebook and someone had posted a link of a video of a man brutally punishing a little boy in front of two other children.  I don't understand this kind of monster.  I don't understand the monster in the ReMoved video.  They almost seem un-human...or in the least inhumane.
This is the 'that' I do not know how to pray for.  I believe this is going to be the ultimate struggle for me in this journey.  As Papa and I not only form a relationship with the new kiddo(s), we will also form a relationship with their family of origin, or biological family. I must decide now what kind of relationship that is going to be.  I believe it will set the stage for healing for the kiddo(s), and let's be honest....that is most important.
Is it going to be a relationship of judgement?  I can easily judge them for their past actions, their past mistakes.  However, I make mistakes everyday.  I can't see into the future, but I'm pretty sure I am going to make mistakes tomorrow, and the next day, and the next.  Would I do what these parents did, absolutely not.  I must remember, though, that when Jesus was hanging on the cross, I am sure my sin didn't weigh less on His shoulders then theirs did. They are hopelessly in need of a Savior, just like me.
Is it going to be a relationship of pity? Compassion and pity are VERY different emotions.  Pity implies that I am in someway better than they are.  I am somehow on a higher level than they are. Compassion has a hint of understanding.  Now, my understanding for them won't come because I've been in their shoes, but my understanding must come in love.  I understand that they are hurting, I understand the ONLY way to heal their hurt.  I understand that God loves and cares for them, just like me.
It must be a relationship of 'Carpe Aeternitatem'.  My principal sent this in a devotion once and I put it in my phone immediately.  I really like its meaning.  We have all heard 'Carpe Diem', or 'seize the day'.  Carpe Aeternitatem means 'to seize ETERNITY'. The relationships and focus of our foster care ministry cannot be on the here and now, or it won't be possible.  Our focus has to be on eternity and on Christ's commission to us. God tells us in Acts chapter 26 to start with those that are the closest to us.  How sad it was when the angels arrived in Sodom and Gomorrah to find that Lot hadn't even reached his own family with the good news, let alone his neighbors and his city.
So.....Carpe Aeternitatem! Seize eternity today for those you come in contact with.  Pray for your family and the families that you and your children come into contact with everyday, that your witness and your light may shine brighter than ever!!  

While I'm waiting........

Patience is not a virtue that I have been blessed with. I believe there are many types of patience.  I have patience with E (daughter), patience with kiddos in my class at school and at church, I have patience for Papa Allen, however WAITING PATIENCE is not something I have.
When I was pregnant with E, I dealt with the waiting in lots of different ways.  I read books about babies and raising children, I rearranged the nursery at least a dozen times, I reorganized her closet and clothes at least once a week, and I just tried to stay busy.
Well, as we wait for #2 and/or #3 I find myself in that same bind. I've read blogs about what to do while you wait for the call. PRAY is the biggest advice to fill the time.  Pray for you and your spouse.  Pray for the child(ren) that will be placed in your home. Pray for their families and parents.  Pray for the social workers and people that will be part of the 'team' you will work with.  I think this is really good advice because a strong prayer life is what is going to help get you through.  I feel it is also a way to form a bond with the biological parents before you even meet.  God can start working in their hearts even before your paths cross.
E and I recently visited family in IN and went to the Children's Museum up there.  (Which is FABULOUS by the way.)  They have a HUGE new exhibit on the Terracotta Army of Qin Shi Huang, the first Emperor of China.  This Terracotta Army was built to guard the tomb of Qin Shi Huang so that he was protected in the afterlife.  There were over 8,000 soldiers all of which had different faces carved into the terracotta clay.  Qin Shi Huang not only prepared his defense for the afterlife, but he also prepared to be entertained with an under ground stream and garden that held all different types of birds, also carved from the terracotta clay.  As we explored this exhibit, I was amazed at the extent of preparation Qin Shi Huang went to.  He began constructing his army when he was 13 years old.  Imagine preparing to die from the age of 13.
God tells us in a very familiar scripture in Philippians;  "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
I imagine that the parents we are going to come in contact with are hurting.  I imagine they are going to be struggling with all sorts of 'demons', be they of this world or not.  Their hearts need guarding.  OUR hearts need guarding.  Just like Qin Shi Huang's terracotta clay, I believe prayer is what is going to hold us together through this next adventure.
So, I have taken the advice of the experienced foster bloggers out there, and I have began to pray.  Much more than I was previously doing and specifically for this situation.  I am even considering a prayer journal where I can record my petitions and see how God answers them through the next few months and beyond.  It's crazy to think that the kiddo(s) that we may be a safe haven for, may be out there right now.  I pray that God is putting people in their lives and in the lives of their family that guide them not only to us, but to Him.

When God rules your life......change is good!!

Change is good.  Not a statement I thought I would ever make.  I don't like change.  I like my little part of the world to stay the same.  Had we not moved to GA, I would have been content to teach the same thing in the same little room in Knoxville for the rest of my life.  However, change happens.  When God sees a hole for you to fill, you must change. You must roll with the punches and change right along side God's plan for you.  Sometimes we....well I....think that once God's called you to something.....that's what you do.  However, He calls you to somethings for a season, and then changes your calling to fill the need in His Creation.
Last November, we had one of those changes.  Jason loosing his job shut the door on so many things.  Our journey into foster care was one of them.  Jason and I had prayed that if this wasn't what we were supposed to be doing, that God would slam the door hard......and He did.  While so much hurt and anger surrounded this change...I look back just eight months later and see God's design, and MAN is it magnificent.
As I have posted before, we have began the process again to become foster parents.  We had picked up right where we left off with our agency.  However, through a VBX teaching meeting for church (aka VBS) God brought a wonderful new friend and person into my life that also happens to have experience and a heart for foster care.  A two minute conversation that included the typical "get to know you" info also included a comment made by her...'I would love to get a foster care ministry going at our church.' Really?? (Insert heart flutter, goose bumps, and all the other physical signs of the Holy Spirit moving)
Now, rewind a few years.  A dear couple from our previous church had fostered and adopted through an organization that partners with churches.  I would not have known about this agency had we not been at our previous church.....I would not have been at this VBX meeting had Jason not lost his job at said previous church.
So, T (the wonderful new friend) and I began meeting and praying.  Jason and I began praying.  Jason and I decided to switch agencies, so we could be 'the pilot family' for our church. T and I presented a partnership ministry to our church, that they loved.
Change stinks.  However, God uses/causes change so that His Kingdom can grow.  Our church has a goal to bring 300 far from Christ people into the love and a relationship with our Lord and Savior this year.  Who is more hurting than parents that are in danger of loosing their children.  Faithbridge Fostercare partners with churches so that when/if reunification is possible, biological families have a place to reach out for support and love as they rebuild their lives.  Our church already has AMAZING community resources available such as a food pantry, career clothes closest, mental health counseling, job training, preschool, and computer skills training.  We hope and pray that this fostercare partnership will be an extension of that.
As far as our personal journey.....we get fingerprinted on Wednesday which is the last piece of our paperwork.  Lord willing our home study will be sometimes between June 16th and June 26th.  We have our training weekend on June 27th-June 29th......and then we are ready to roll!!  We have our spare bedroom set up with a twin bed and we are working on a crib.  Bring 'em on!!!! :)
If you are curious or interested in foster care please check out the following agencies...I also put our churches website in case you are looking.  Our church is beyond AWESOME!!
www.gcacofgeorgia.com
www.faithbridgefostercare.org
www.cumberlandchurch.org